1,250 words
In America today, the ultimate taboo is uttering the so-called “N-word.” But you can get around that with an “N-Word Pass,” although only a genuine N can issue it. Basically, the pass takes the form, “Go ahead, bro. I won’t be offended.”
On the American Right, however, the ultimate taboo is voting for the Democrats. We need to destroy that taboo. Thus, as an American Rightist, I am issuing “D-Vote Passes” for the upcoming midterms. Go ahead. I won’t be offended.
In fact, I would be delighted, for the D-Vote Pass is a new weapon against the Republican establishment, including MAGA Inc.
Politicians are consummate cynics. They think their job is to betray the common good of the nation and the trust of their voters in order to give the wealthy and powerful what they want. Politicians do, however, pay attention to “electability.” They can’t very well screw the voters if they are no longer in office. Thus every politician calculates just how much he can betray his constituency without losing reelection, and they will go right up to that line, because they are ravenous for a share of the loot.
But generally, the worst thing politicians need worry about is a large number of their voters staying home on election day. Every voter who does that costs them one vote. But what if disaffected Republicans decide not simply to throw their own votes away? What if they decide to cancel the votes of other Republicans?
If you voted Republican in the past but abstain, the Republicans are down one vote. Let’s say they go from 50/50 to 50/49. If you vote Democrat, however, the total will be 51/49. Thus the Republicans are now down two votes.
If it feels good to stay home on election day to show your displeasure, then let me tempt you with even greater satisfaction.
Envision the smuggest Boomer Republican: the kind of guy who thinks you are lazy, entitled, and just need to tug harder on your bootstraps; the kind of guy who thinks that Israel is our greatest ally, and “We need to fight them over there, so we don’t have to fight them over here”; the kind of guy whose greatest fear is still the N-word, or worse, the R-word (racist).
Because he thinks that there’s nothing worse than racism (but only for white people), he is delighted when one of the Left’s favored groups—non-whites, women, gays, even trannies—mouths Republican talking points, for he feels that such people give him moral validation. If only we could run such people for office, such Rainbow Republicans would advance the Republican agenda, be immune from criticism, and allow the whole party to bask in a glow of moral unimpeachability.
Even Trump thinks this way. That’s why we got such diverse Republican losers as Herschel Walker in Georgia, Dr. Mohammed Genghis Oz in Pennsylvania, and Winsome Earle-Sears in Virginia. That’s why we got trial balloons for Bruce “Caitlin” Jenner running for governor of California. That’s why we have the loathsome scammer Vivek Ramaswamy running for governor of Ohio today.
Imagine the sort of Boomer Republican who laps up that kind of slop and comes back for seconds. Maybe you know one personally. Give him a face. Give him a name.
Now imagine doubling—nay tripling—your pleasure on election day. Instead of just withholding your vote by staying home, go to the polls and picture yourself canceling this Boomer’s vote by voting Democrat. Because that’s in effect what you are doing. If you switch your vote to Democrat, it is as if the biggest Boomer Republican you know never voted at all.
If the idea of a D-Vote Pass goes viral—hint, hint—it will give Republican politicians and political consultants nightmares. And that’s a good thing. They need to fear the voters, and they don’t fear them enough. But if betrayals routinely lead not to abstentions but defections to the other side, that doubles the negative consequences of betrayal. Which means there will be fewer betrayals.
“But Greg, be reasonable. You don’t want these crazy Leftists back in power, do you? You don’t want to cut off your nose to spite your face, right?”
No, I don’t. But the best way to keep crazy Leftists out of power is for the Right to keep promises to their voters. And the best way to guarantee that Republicans keep their promises is to make them live in fear of the voters they routinely betray. And the D-Vote Pass gives them more reason to worry.
It is all well and good to advise me to “be reasonable” and not vote out of spite. Rationality in an imperfect world means choosing the least bad option. Politicians know this, of course. Thus they will only betray their voters up to the point that they become worse than their rivals in the eyes of likely voters. The more rational and discerning the voters, the further politicians will go in betraying their constituents, because they know that even the most minuscule differences will be enough to reelect them.
But expecting voters to be rational is itself irrational. Irrational and spiteful voters exist in vast numbers, and they are harder to manipulate than people like me. But for some reason, the GOP still thinks they can maximize betrayal and pay no price as long as they are a micron less horrible than the Democrats. So what is the GOP counting on?
They might be assuming that most voters who abstain will never cross the line and vote Democrat because they would feel somehow “dirty.” When my old friend Louis Andews argued for voting for Obama in 2008, that was my response: “I’m fine with abstaining. But I would feel dirty to vote for someone like Obama.” The more conservative a person is, the stronger his disgust reflex when contemplating the deformed, the diseased, the insane, the Left.
Louis scoffed at that attitude, and he was right to. I was willing to abstain from voting for John McCain, because I thought it was better for him to lose. But if I preferred he lose, then shouldn’t I do everything in my power to make that happen by actually voting for the other side? In effect, I needed a D-Vote Pass to help get me over my disgust reflex at voting for the Democrats. Indeed, if Louis had simply written “D-Vote Pass” on a piece of paper and handed it to me, it might have made a difference by underscoring the absurdity of my position.
The idea of a D-Vote Pass would be far more frightening to the GOP if we had a bloody scalp to wave in victory. My suggestion is that we focus entirely on Vivek Scammaswamy in Ohio. Vivek encapsulates everything rotten about MAGA, Big Tech, and the GOP. Thus destroying his political career would have tremendous symbolic value. But it wouldn’t have terrible political consequences for the country as a whole. It is a state race, not a national one. Ohio’s legislature will remain Republican. Thus putting a Jewish Democrat in the governor’s mansion surely wouldn’t be worse than an Indian scam artist who would open the gates of the Turd World.
So, to all my readers in Ohio, you have my D-Vote Pass. Consider yourself absolved of all forms of guilt, bad karma, and Democrat contagion. You are also duly deputized to extend this D-Vote Pass to all friends and family. Let’s defeat Vivek and put the fear of white voters into MAGA and the GOP.
A nice read, perfectly written as always Dr.Johnson
Nah for all trumps Israel worship and his flaws, migration is at net negative and his administration is way further to the right then any other in recent history. Now in the case of the Vivek election I simply wouldn’t vote due to both choices being catastrophic.